College Football Week 4 Picks

3-2 vs the spread last week, 8-7-1 for the year (2-0 on UPSET SPECIALS, including Ole Miss over Alabumble). . .

The Punching Bag Coach of the Early Season is Arkan'tsas blowhard Bret Bielema.  Two weeks ago, after blowing hard about Ohio State's sissy schedule being so inferior to the supposedly difficult ones faced by SEC West teams, Bielema's Razorbacks lost at home to marshmallow Toledo. . .and Bret was unmercifully mocked on social media.  Saturday Texas Tech head coach Kliff Kingsbury decided to kick the dog Bielema while he was down.  Tech is a *traditional* spread offense team, and Kingsbury is the son of a Texas high school spread coach.  Last year, Arkan'tsas beat the shit out of Tech, pummeling them with old fashioned power run football, and then in the offseason blowhard Bret mocked spread offenses at a Texas high school coaches clinic.  Bret bragged he would kick the ass of any faggy spread offense team that dared play him without using a fullback.  Apparently Kingsbury took Bielema's comments personally, and after the Red Raiders spread and sodomized the Razorbacks, koach Kliff scorned Bielema:

OK.  Bielema is a loudmouth, and a shameless braggart who hasn't really done anything to merit his bragging, and his Arkan'tsas team is one of the early season's biggest flops, but who the Hell is Kingsbury trying to kid with that tough guy act, with his faggot haircut and that faggot flower in his lapel?  Hey, koach, don't be so fucking sensitive, and win a few more games before you go opening your mouth (unless you're heading to the rest stop glory hole).  Right now you just look like a silly ass faggot starting shit over nothing.  
   
Brigham Young University +4.5 at Michigan: I'm surprised the Wolverines are the favorite.  Their two wins have come over lousy teams, mainly because of their defense.  The pass offense is horrible, 5th year senior transfer QB Jake Rudock already has 5 ints and can barely complete a pass more than 10 yards down field, and the running game is nothing special.  BYU won two last minute thrillers over Nebraska and Boise State on Haily Marys from 22 yr old freshman QB Tanner Mangum, then lost in the last minute at UCLA.  BYU looks better across the board.  Brigham Young University.  

Texas Christian University -8 at Texas Tech: OK, koach Kliff, let's see what you can do against a genuine hard ass, TCU's Gary Patterson.  My prediction: Nothing.  TCU.  

Oklahoma State -2.5 at Texas: Ha ha ha. . .negro wonder boy coach Charlie Strong's Wronghorns found yet another way to lose last week, missing a game-tying extra point on the last play against California!  But Charlie was so proud of his losers, fighting back from a 21 point deficit and ALMOST winning (er, tying), he was nearly in tears in his post game press conference. He's sure his Wronghorns are just about to turn the corner.  Yeah.  OK.  But Cal is not really that tough a team, and I would bet cash dollars white man coach Mike Gundy's Cowboys put a butt whipping on the Wronghorns.  Oklahoma State.   

UCLA -3 at Arizona: Big early season Pac-12 South showdown.  UCLA's Jew Freshman QB Josh Rosen had a great first game against crappy Virginia, but has tailed off dramatically the last two weeks, and was downright terrible against BYU, passing for only 106 yards and tossing 3 ints, the Bruins only won because of tailback Paul Perkins 200+ rushing yards.  RichRod has his usual team, killer offense, horseshit defense that needs turnovers and luck to beat the good teams.  I think he gets the turnovers from Rosen and UCLA.  Arizona.