NFL Week 6 Picks

1-4 vs the spread last week, 17-18 for the year. . .

Here's a ranking of all NFL Head Coaches, from best to worst:

1. Bill Belichick, Patriots	No brainer
2. Mike Zimmer, Vikings	Once he wins SB, will move to #1
3. Pete Carroll, Seahawks	Best defensive coach of All-Time?
4. John Harbaugh, Ravens	4th best coach in League, 3rd best coach in his family
5. Mike McCarthy, Packers	Won a ton of games with a faggot QB
6. Sean Payton, Saints	Dropping rapidly
7. Ron Rivera, Panthers	Wins a lot of games with shitty players
8. Bruce Arians, Cardinals	Would win a SB if he could find a QB who can stand up for a full season
9. Andy Reid, Chiefs	18 years in the Parity League, and only 3 crummy seasons
10. Gary Kubiak, Broncos	Nervous Nellie, somehow won a SB, withiout it, he'd be in bottom third
11. Marvin Harrison, Bengals	Best coach never to win a Big Game
12. Jack Del Rio, Raiders	Unlike the vast majority of his peers, he is not afraid to coach to win
13. Mike Tomlin, Steelers	Worst coach ever to win a Super Bowl, has best players in League last 3 years
14. John Fox, Bears	Sliding rapidly as he fails in Windy City
15. Jason Garrett, Cowboys	Does he have the guts to tell Romo to take a seat on the bench?
16. Bill O'Brien, Texans	Good coach, horrible judge of QBs
17. Dan Quinn, Falcons	If his feam doesn't fade like it did last year, will shoot up quickly
18. Jeff Fisher, Rams	Stale, always manages to beat the Seahawks, though
19. Rex Ryan, Bills	Entertaining blowhard, not smart enough to ever win Big
20. Todd Bowles, Jets	Dull negro coach
21. Doug Pederson, Eagles	Early sample size could be deceiving
22. Chuck Pagano, Colts	His teams are soft
23. Dirk Koetter, Buccaneers	Will live or die on rapist Jameis Winston
24. Jay Gruden, Redskins	Luckiest coach in the League
25. Mike Mularkey, Titans	Nondescript coach, gotta stick him somewhere. . .
26. Chip Kelly, 49ers	Won't win again until he goes back to college
27. Ben McAdoo, Giants	He ain't no Tom Coughlin, nobody will even remember him in 3 years
28. Hue Jackson, Browns	With that roster, impossible to tell if he is good or bad
29. Jim Caldwell, Lions	Great coach Mon through Saturday, horrible on Sunday
30. Mike McCoy, Chargers	Great 58 minute coach
31. Gus Bradley, Jaguars	His roster gets better and better, but he never wins more games
32. Adam Gase, Miami	Made a mediocre QB worse

San Francisco +7 at Buffalo: Was it just 3 1/2 years ago Chip Kelly was the *genius* who was going to revolutionize the National Football League? With his HyperSonic No-Huddle Offense and his *quirky* player personnel moves?  How did that turn out?  Epic fail.  Run out of Philadelphia after his offense fizzled and his defensive players quit on him, he landed in San Francisco, where it should have been easy to look like an improvement over the inept Jim Tomsula. . .but at 1-4, with four straight blow-out losses, the 49ers seem even worse.  Now *genius* Kelly makes the dumb move all desperate coaches make when they can't figure out how to win: change the quarterback.  Blaine Gabbert ought to change his name to Blame Gabbert after being thrown under the bus by Kelly, who now stupidly turns to the failed Colin Kaepernick.  Does Kelly really think Kaepernick will suddenly turn back into a Super Bowler, like some frog QB kissed by Jim Harbaugh?  No. Kelly knows Kaepernick sucks, that's why he went with Blame Gabbert in the first place. . .but like all desperate losing coaches who play QB roulette, he now pins his hopes on being stupid: maybe I was wrong, maybe QB2 really is better than QB1, and I was just too retarded to see it!  So here's the fate of the *genius* Kelly: all his hopes lay in him really being a moron.  As for Kaepernick, with his National Anthem antics, he makes a fine sideshow, and has become something of a football anti-hero. . .but he risks tarnishing his BLM cred by going 15 for 30 with 2 INTs. . .throw a pick six, lose the game, and those Kaepernick jerseys will look like clown costumes instead of rebel fashion wear.  Man, I mean, just look at the 49ers!  Has there ever been an NFL Head Coach/Quarterback combo that featured two bigger oddballs?  For Buffalo, Rex Ryan started the year looking like a buffoon with a one way ticket out of the League, but somehow he and his slob DC brother have put together a 3 game winning streak.  The Ryan brothers should enjoy this success while they can, for their luck will probably run out as soon as the 49ers leave town.  Buffalo.         

Baltimore +3 at New York Giants: When the Ravens were 3-0 I said in this venerable football blog they were the worst 3-0 team in the history of the NFL. . .and they've went out the last two weeks and proved it, losing to the Raiders and Redskins.  Hell, even John Harbaugh knew the Ravens were a pile of horseshit when they were 3-0. . .he didn't just out of the blue fire faggot and former *genius* OC Marc Trestman. . .he knew his offense was garbage all season, but it took a couple losses to get him to pull the trigger.  Will new OC Marty Mornhinweg do any better?  Even though *Take The Wind In OT* Marty was one of the NFL's worst head coaches ever, 5-27 in two seasons with Detroit, he has a decent track record as a coordinator with the 49ers and Eagles, and somehow managed to get an offense for Rex Ryan in 2013 to go 8-8 with Geno Smith at QB. . .Hell, he can't be worse than that pussy Trestman.  The Giants are 2-3, but probably really ought to be 0-5. . .they got the Cowboys in Week 1, before Dallas' negro wonder rookies got it into gear, and squeaked out a home win over the crappy Saints in Week 2.  The bumbling Chargers could easily beat the shit out of both of these teams.  Ravens win and become the worst 4-2 team in the history of the League.  Baltimore.

Los Angeles +3.5 at Detroit: Two very flawed teams, with the Rams horrible offense matching up against the Lions crippled defense.  Dee-troit actually angered their own fans by upsetting unbeaten Philadelphia last week. . .longtime Lions fans were hoping an embarrassing home loss to the Eagles would push Nigger Jim Caldwell out the door, but now it seems they'll have to suffer his uninspiring presence for the rest of the season.  Caldwell probably knew he was just minutes from being shit-canned, as he abandoned his normally catatonic sideline demeanor to visibly celebrate as the Lions recovered a gift-of-an-Eagles-Chargers-like-fumble that led to their winning field goal.  While Caldwell jumped for joy, Lions fans slumped in despair as the home team's next draft pick in its 59 year rebuilding project slid further down the first round.  Los Angeles.

Pittsburgh -7 at Miami: No rookie head coach has done a worse job than Adam Gase, who was supposed to be an offensive *genius*, even though his previous teams' offenses (Denver and Chicago) never looked earth-shattering  Unbelievably, the Dolphins actually suck more under Gase than they did under goofy-looking Joe Philbin.  Gase was supposed to be a quarterback *guru,* but Ryan Tannehill has never played worse, and the defense is still shitty. . .and I have a feeling Donkeykong Suh is about to snap. . .Ben Roethlisberger may need eyes in the back of his head for this game.  Anyway, even though the Steelers under negro head coach Mike Tomlin have a penchant for not showing up against crappy teams, they can still win this game with even the most minimal effort and attention to detail.  Pittsburgh. 

Atlanta +6 at Seattle: Can the Falcons actually beat the Broncos and Seahawks back-to-back on the road?  Win in the toughest stadiums in the League?  Yes. Just like the Broncos didn't have an offense to challenge the Falcons weak defense, same with the Seahawks, which means even though the Falcons offense will be slowed a little by the opponent's quality defense, they can still outscore their mediocre counterparts.  Dan Quinn beats his old boss.  Atlanta.

Dallas +4 at Green Bay: Even though the Packers are 3-1, Aaron Rodgers is still playing like a lovesick faggot. . .and the Packers are just an average team.  This game will prove it, as the Cowboys with their negro wonder rookies Prescott and Elliott roll over the Fudge Packers.  Dallas.